There's been a lot of talk lately about the need for more authenticity on Instagram and sharing more of the everyday, the imperfections, and realness of our lives. This feed is the highlight reel of my life, and like many others, I spend a good amount of time curating it to show the most "perfect" version of my life. But it definitely does not show the other 99.9%. So, in case there is anyone out there who thinks my life is all sunshine and rainbows all the time - *NEWSFLASH* - it's far from it! .
Some highlights from my "real" life:
- I've discovered recently that my house has a mice problem (but hey, cheap rent y'all). -
-My Gmail inbox has 35,000+ unread emails. And then I just upgraded my Google storage because it was easier to pay $2/month than it was to clear out my inbox.
- I end up eating some sort of frozen entree from Trader Joe's for dinner most days out of sheer laziness - and sometimes I'm so tired that I can't even bring myself to heat up a frozen pizza, so I eat Girl Scout cookies instead...in bed. .
- My room is constantly a disaster area (geez, and I wonder why I have that mice problem. But seriously, FML). .
- I have a giant crater growing on my lip in the form of a cold sore, and I am a bridesmaid for a wedding in 3 days...which means I am probably going to be in 48579375 photos with said crater (attractive, eh?). .
- I have a tendency hit snooze on my alarm one too many times in the morning, and end up not waking up in time to catch my train, so I end up taking an Uberpool to work more times than I care to admit. .
-Part of my New Year's resolution was to do more yoga, run more, and train for a full marathon...but I still haven't gone to the gym since Thanksgiving.
In other words, my life is pretty much one big, giant hot mess. Anyone relate here? What are some of the more imperfect moments from your life?
When my folks passed, the first thing that concerned me was the feeling of losing the safety net.
A family is the best, unconditional hedge for risk-taking. When you decide to try something bold in life and it doesn't work out, or you need an extra push, family is almost always there to have your back.
So losing my folks, basically my pillar on the west coast, I worried that if things broke bad, I wouldn't have anywhere to turn. This, of course, stifles you into a tiny world where you no longer take risks or deviate from the safe road. "What'll I do when I need to fix my bathroom? What happens if I lose my job? What if I get sick?" You say these things because we need contingencies for the infinite incalculable ways life happens.
But, the thing is, our plans and anticipations abut an infinite tide of circumstances unplannable and unpredictable, tempered in countless degrees of magnitude. So while I was fighting, I had to lean on other people in my world; of course, I'm eternally thankful for my friends who had my back. And when the sink needed replacement, I learned how to fix it myself. When I decided to go back to grad school, I called the dean, and we created a plan.
You go through these exercises and realize you have a capacity to deal with most circumstances on your terms, that you ultimately need the vulnerability and humility to ask for help when things get hard. Following through with the gumption to tackle the challenge, regardless of initial confidence, is in the head game. It's always the head game. The easy road is to do nothing and be swallowed by circumstance. The hard road, which eventually becomes the easy road, is the willingness to fight for whatever you want from life.
Solving problems grants you the determination to solve more.
You realize taking risks has little to do with hedging, and more to do with your attitude and tenacity.
Song of the Day: Washed Out – “It All Feels Right"